Is your career or educational success, or your personal life, wellbeing, or sexual relating, threatened by stress and underlying anxiety, fear, worries, low self-esteem, insecurity, self-doubt, overload, or dissatisfaction?
I extend a very warm welcome to you.
Hello, I'm Keith, an experienced stress management coach and cognitive behavioural coach, with a long background as a former integrative counsellor, and, earlier, as a Fulbright Award-winning educator. From my MA training in counselling and psychotherapy, and from my former experience as an integrative counsellor, I am knowledgeable in a wide range of humanistic and cognitive behavioural approaches that are equally applicable to the evidence-based coaching that I offer.
It's my pleasure to provide coaching for individual adults, relationship couples, or small groups. My focus is on coaching for stress management, with particular emphasis on managing or resolving those underlying emotions, feelings and behaviours associated with your stress which impede or block your success, your self-achievement, and mind & body wellbeing. Our coaching together can target any, or all, areas of your career, your personal life, educational contexts, your sexuality / sexual relationship(s), and your overall mind and body wellbeing.
As a Stress Management Coach and
Cognitive Behavioural Coach
what is the scope of my coaching?
My specialisation is in coaching you when you feel blocked from attaining your desired goals, self-achievement, self-fulfilment, happiness or wellbeing because of your stress levels, and your underlying stress-inducing anxiety, fear, worries, low self-esteem, insecurity, self-doubt, overload, burnout, frustration and / or dissatisfaction. This may be in any areas of your personal life, your career or professional life, your educational studies or college / university life, or in your sexual relationships.
My stress management coaching focuses on helping you to understand, manage and overcome your stress and these stressful, unhelpful and success-blocking negative emotions, feelings, thoughts and behaviours that result in very serious consequences throughout your entire life.
Once you've learned how to gain effective control over these stress-inducing emotions and feelings, we then work together on creating a positive outcome in whatever your goals may be for whatever areas of your life you wish to move forward in.
One major aspect of using stress management coaching to reduce the long-term serious stress created by these emotional states, feelings, and associated behaviours, is that the lowering of your stress response improves your mental ease and comfort. From this, because of the mind-body effect, your physical health outlook improves tremendously, thereby further boosting your emotional wellbeing through this mind-body inter-connective loop.
All of this results in an increased ability to learn, increased perceptivity, memory, analytical skills, concentration, sociability / ability to relate to others, ability to focus more clearly on future-planning, and good decision-making. This operates, of course, at all levels and in all areas of your life. And, following stress management coaching, you may also find that your sexual desire and arousal (libido), and reproductive system, return to their previous levels of functionality if stress in your life has interfered with this.
As a stress management coach, life coach, relationships coach, and cognitive behavioural coach since 2000, and former integrative counsellor focused on stressful life issues and sexual relationship counselling between 2000 and 2013, I have almost thirty years of combined experience in the successful use of evidence-based psychologically-derived approaches.
My stress management coaching methods include cognitive behavioural coaching, one of my favourite, most scientifically-verified and highly targeted approaches for helping you to move forward from where you currently are, to where you would prefer to be. Alternatively, where a broader, more holistic, multi-faceted approach to stress management coaching may be helpful (or preferred by you), I combine various humanistic and / or mind-body healing methodologies. For example, this might include positivity training, mindfulness training, controlled deep breathing exercises, anger management, improved communication skills, and / or many, many others. This integrative approach, which can sometimes also include cognitive behavioural strategies, is very effective in stress management coaching generally, and particularly so in stress management coaching for sexuality and sexual relationships.
Ultimately, my aim is that of working with you from where you now are, to support, motivate and mentor you in moving forward to achieve your desired goals, self-fulfilment and overall wellbeing in any areas of your life. During this process I believe that the quality, warmth and ethicality of the professional relationship between us, and my unconditional acceptance of you as a uniquely valuable human being, is the key to a successful outcome in our work together.
throughout my website, for greater detail.
Some potential clients contact me initially for stress management coaching, or cognitive behavioural coaching, with just a vague feeling that some form of self-change or self-development is desired, or crucial, to make success and achievement possible again in their stressful life. By contrast, others already know precisely what goals they wish to achieve from coaching. Some have even already started out on their journey of dealing with stressful aspects of self-development or self-change, either self-driven and highly motivated, or with prior help from other coaching, or as an offshoot of recent counselling or therapy. It really doesn't matter exactly where along this continuum you happen to be, I'm happy to start stress management coaching / cognitive behavioural coaching with you.
We will clearly identify from our early meetings what self-changes in your currently stressful life, and what specific self-development goals, you wish to achieve. From that, we will then focus on creating a structured approach to making the achievement of your self-changes or other goals a serious practicality. This includes in your personal, career, educational and family life, and also, of course, in your general self-care and wellbeing.
As a stress management and cognitive behavioural coach my professional focus is on helping you, firstly, to understand the stress-inducing anxiety, fear, worries, low self-esteem, insecurity, self-doubt, overload, burnout, frustration and / or dissatisfaction that may be blocking you from achieving what you wish to achieve in your life or relationships. Then, from this basis of greater self-understanding, I'll guide you in moving forward, step-by-step, to achieve lower stress levels and the self-development, positivity, focus, mindfulness and self-belief necessary for you to attain your desired self-fulfilment, goals and ambitions. This might even be a total self-reinvention in your life. This is all achieved via an individualised self-development programme, devised jointly between us as a team effort.
Additionally, as a former integrative counsellor heavily focused on sexual relationships counselling, I also specialise in guiding, motivating and supporting your self-development, emotional wellbeing and self-care across all areas of sexual relating where there are stress-reducing self-changes or improvements you wish to make. This might involve self-development in communication, replacing relationship negativity with positivity, or areas of your relating or sexuality that you wish to learn more about, or many other areas that you wish to improve on or develop somewhat differently.
What do I offer as a stress management coach and cognitive behavioural coach; and how do I work with you? My chosen form of coaching is generally an integration of person-centred / humanistic approaches with other helpful strategies, particularly cognitive behavioural approaches (see below), which provide a focus on you as a “whole person”, and on your overall self-care and wellbeing throughout. The moving forward towards your goal component is achieved by us together as a team, working directly on your thoughts, feelings and behaviours. This is most often by using time-proven and very effective cognitive behavioural coaching strategies (though I do, of course, have many other approaches available as well, particularly in initial stress management, personal life skills and sexual relationships coaching).
What is cognitive behavioural coaching? Cognitive behavioural coaching may sound a bit scary, nail-biting or "psychological", but it's really a very gentle, completely unscary, and easy-to-understand approach (and I guarantee you won’t chew a single finger nail!). Cognitive behavioural coaching approaches are based on the understanding that, as individuals, how we perceive (think and feel) about our lives and problems deeply affects our ability to deal with or manage them. Self-defeating negative thoughts and feelings, low self-esteem, anxiety, fear, insecurity, etcetera, can destroy your emotional and physical wellbeing, and determine failure or a bad result in any or all aspects of your life. And, sadly, because these negative automatic thoughts (often called NATs) are automatic you may not even realise that you have these very distorted and untrue views and feelings about yourself or your life, until we actually root them out and deal with them together.
These negative thoughts (and the negative feelings, behaviours and outcomes which they create throughout your life and relationships) can be changed into positive thoughts, positive beliefs and feelings, and better or good outcomes by you being taught how to create your own thinking, feeling and behaviour patterns. Positive thoughts are used in this process to challenge, and replace, your negative thoughts with something much more realistic and useful in your life.
This process, called CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) in counselling and therapy, and CBC (cognitive behavioural coaching) in life coaching is not new. In fact, various cognitive approaches have been in use around the world by psychologists, doctors, nurses, social workers and counsellors since the 1950s (REBT) and 1960s (CBT). More recently, since the 1990s, cognitive behavioural training has become more available for life coaches.
In my case, however, I trained in the core skills of cognitive behavioural approaches over twenty years ago in London with one of the world's foremost cognitive behavioural therapists, coaches and CBC creators, Gladeana McMahon, in the UEL School of Psychology, during my early Counselling and Psychotherapy MA training. I’ve developed my skills and approaches in this area throughout all of my coaching work, and my former integrative counselling work, with private clients ever since. Since their introduction, cognitive behavioural therapy and coaching have proved incredibly effective over the past half-century, including when used for stress, and stress-related areas.
Such stress-related areas also include anxiety, fear, worries, low self-esteem, insecurity, self-doubt, overload, burnout, frustration and / or dissatisfaction, which is why CBC is usually my main chosen approach for self-care / wellbeing improvement and self-development in most areas of my coaching. Additionally, I do, of course, also integrate into my work a wide range of humanistic strategies that I’ve been trained in, wherever they may be helpful to clients. You can expect that this will be particularly the case if I'm working with you on relationships and sexuality self-development, wellbeing or self-care coaching.
You can read listings below of all the life areas that my coaching can cover with you, from my base serving the Inverness, Great Glen, Strathspey, Moray Firth and Highland(s) regions.
Stress Management Coaching
and Cognitive Behavioural Coaching
creating self-achievement and fulfilment in your personal life,
your career, your education, etcetera
*Identifying goals in any area of your life, relationships, etc., with clarity
*Making goal achievement / self-development accessible to you
*Learning how to feel in control of your life and events
*Identifying toxic elements in your life, and then devising strategies to minimise their effect on you, or even removing them if possible
*Reassessing your priorities in life to relieve stress, anxiety and fear
*Improving your communication skills
*Assertion training and learning to take, or regain, control over potentially stressful and anxiety and fear-generating situations in your life
*Stress, anxiety and fear management
*Coping with stress, anxiety and overwhelming fear
*Understanding and managing low self-esteem
*Positive thinking as a way forward to wellbeing, self-development and goal achievement
*Mindfulness training as a way to create inner focus and calm
*Understanding and managing insecurity
*Review of your decision-making and life-choices skills in life, at work, in relationships, etc.
*Migration / international relocation: Adapting to life, work or study in a new country
For more details specifically on my stress-related coaching, please see Stress management for you.
by increasing self-development and understanding
in sexuality and intimate relating
*Understanding and self-validating your sexuality and relationship needs
*Managing stress and anxiety between sexual partners
*Negotiating your relationship boundaries or sexual boundaries
*Maintaining relationship or sexual boundaries against coercion
*Self-care and wellbeing for yourself and your intimate relationship
*Dealing with emotional conflict in relating and sex
*Developing or re-discovering your physical / sexual intimacy
*Developing or re-discovering emotional intimacy and wellbeing in sex
*Improving / developing communication skills in sexual relating
*Establishing common relationship goals – what is your relationship about?
*Overcoming shyness, anxiety, fear and insecurity in sexual and intimate emotional situations
*Negotiating change within your relationship
*Learning to relate and understand and support each other’s emotional and sexual needs
*Learning how to develop sexual skills and emotional wellbeing together
*Negotiating changes in relationship structure (e.g. changing from monogamy to non-monogamy, one or more partners exploring a same-gender interest outside of the opposite-gender couple)
*Mindfulness training as a way to create inner focus and calm in sexual situations
*Maintaining sexual pleasure and emotional intimacy as you get older
*Evolving away from emotional and behavioural rigidity in your relating and sexuality
*Getting unstuck from relationship worries, anxiety, and insecurities
*Developing your communication and partnering skills further in your sexual relating (working with either an individual, couple or small group)
*Enjoying sex as older partners and staying connected to, or re-developing, sexual intimacy
And, of course, as a sexual relationship coach focused on your self-care I am also always pleased to answer difficult, embarrassing questions about sexuality and relating, concerning absolutely any kind of consensual sexual context. Nothing shocks me, embarrasses me, or causes me to judge you in any way whatsoever.
For more details on my specialisation with sexuality and relationships please see my relationships and sexuality section.
Who do I work with?
Since 2000, my coaching practice has always been very international, cosmopolitan, and widely welcoming to fellow humans from all socio-economic backgrounds. I have worked face-to-face with adult individuals and couples of all ages, from dozens of countries, and by phone and internet with persons from as far away as Vietnam.
Whatever areas of your life and self-care we may be working on together, whether face-to-face within my Inverness based office, or by some other medium, please be reassured that as a psychologically-based professional I'm very comfortable working with adults from all sexual lifestyles, sexualities and orientations. This includes traditional monogamous, LGBT, ethically non-monogamous / polyamorous, polysexual, demisexual or asexual, whatever. In fact, as a sexuality specialist, I am completely friendly and welcoming to, supportive of, and knowledgeable about all gender combinations, sexualities and lifestyles involving adult, mutually consensual, informed sexuality and relating. All are very natural and normal examples of the wide range of human life experience.
for stress management coaching and cognitive behavioural coaching
As an experienced coach in Inverness, I aim to keep my fees affordable, and my charges range from £50 down to £10 per session or per contact. This depends upon what work we are doing, how we are working (in person, by phone, by email), length of our session together, and whether I’m working with you as an individual, a couple, or as part of a small group. Currently, a 60 minute face-to-face one-person or couple session is £50, increasing to £60 for small groups. A 90 minute session is £70 and £80, respectively. My coaching "top-up" services by phone or email, of course, cost far less. The first in-person session is paid for at the session’s end, and all subsequent sessions are paid for seven days in advance. I accept payments please by electronic bank-to-bank transfer, cash or by cheque. Paid-in-advance sessions are not refundable, nor transferable to another date or time, unless cancelled more than 48 hours in advance.
I have always provided a significant discount for university and technical / technology students, and will always do so. Currently, a valid student photo identification card will entitle you to a 20% reduction on my coaching fees. And, as mentioned above, shorter follow-up stress management, life coaching, relationship coaching or cognitive behavioural coaching sessions, or “top-up” motivational sessions by phone or email with me can also be an area where you can save money. So, coaching with me in Inverness may be far more affordable than you might think.
Please don’t hesitate to contact me: If you would like to chat with me about any aspect of my coaching, your personal coaching needs or goals, or anything else related to this, then please contact me. Details for contact by email or phone are displayed on each website page. I’ll be very pleased to respond promptly to your enquiry. To find out more about me, my general background, philosophy and professional qualifications, please click here.